


Maybe in another life, Maybe in our dreams

by chilipowder



Category: Mr. Robot (TV)
Genre: Drug Use, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-23
Updated: 2017-09-11
Packaged: 2018-12-18 21:19:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11883039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chilipowder/pseuds/chilipowder
Summary: Shayla and Elliot have some plans and celebrations, but when Shayla decides to save the partying till after her date with Angela the next day, that night may have surprises yet for Elliot.





	1. It all started off simple enough

**Author's Note:**

> Well, it's been years since I've put actual effort into anything, and of course it would be now when I get a hair to write again.

Shayla and I were walking together, the destination she kept a secret teasing every now and then, reminding me I should not worry as much as I do. She had already convinced me into trying something new.

I trust Shayla more than I can say I trust almost anyone,  
She's always been a constant, providing the best quality, never asking too many questions, and making sure to get everything I asked, she was always the one I turned to watch after Qwerty, or Flipper, not only because she was my neighbor, but because I know she'd do a good job with it, I can always rely on her to not allow me anything when my thoughts were fogged with the smoke of the burning support beams that is relapse. Plus, she always shared when she had anything new. She's one of the few good people in this world, not allowing this shit show to corrupt her, I'm thankful to have her as my friend, and that she never wants to know what I don't want to share, we allowed each other our own forms of anonymity.

We were still walking, taking hits off a joint she had for the walk hidden from any wondering eyes, the street lights were still so far in the distance, the night air felt amazing half way though.

"But I was thinking, that this will be a very good way to celebrate tomorrow, ya know? After all this stress and worrying of doing a good job and impressing these whoever, coming back with my best neighbor and getting some time without thinking on anything like job interviews, or dates, just think about what ever the waves wants us too, plus you have some days off, best time to try them"

Oh if only she knew I still worked even if I didn't have my badge on, I preferred the work that I do on days off, what I'd be doing now if it wasn't for Shayla, I shrugged handing the joint back to her

"I bet you'll do just fine, you know, just follow the tips"

"Yeah, just follow the tips of the great Elliot". Shayla chuckled. 

she had been asking a lot about how I got my job, to ask coworkers interview tips, she even had a small notebook filled with search results. I really did wish her well, we hadn't discussed where it was she was applying to, as long as she knew I'm sure she can come up with something, plus she's a people person.

"You have plans with Angela don't you? Like, after our meet up or?"

"I almost forgot, I'd feel so bad showing up to a date when it finally hits, how about, after the interview, hang out, work up an appetite, then later, we have the cherry on top of the stress reducing sundae ?"

I laugh softly, warmness was starting to cover my face, 

"Deal"

"On our way back let's get some orange juice, and on my way back tomorrow want me to pick up anything else? I'm thinking a few drinks may go nicely, maybe some more of this"

She said laughing pausing to ash what remained of the joint and storing it. I take out one of my own and we sit down planning out anything else for tomorrow, finishing the last joint before we're in the light.

As we finish she takes out eye drops, as we finish preparing ourselves to once again the possibility of being around people Shayla begins to turn into another alley. 

"We're almost there, it should be coming up anytime now."

As we grew closer we could hear the music, and people, already. It was an abandoned building.  
We looked at one another then at the sight in front of us making our way up the stoop we were greeted at the door,  
Shayla handled the talking and we we're in. 

Sure, this was not my favorite situation, but I was just invisible, in no way was I going to be recognized, and everyone stayed to their own area. Maybe it was the cannabis, or the morphine, maybe even the knowing we were not here for the music, and people, we were here for a quick a, b transaction, then on our way home. It did help that Shayla was willing to talk to people if they came up to us. 

We went up some stairs until it was nearly just us, a few people here and there, but more of flies on the wall than the downstairs group. Shayla told me to stay around this area while she handled it, I leaned against the wall near a window lighting a cigarette, watching the sidewalk down below, letting my mind wonder.

When we made it back to the apartment Shayla stuck the tablets inside my freezer, and put away a few other things as well, we sat and smoked and went over again tomorrow's plans. Shayla thanked me again before she went back to her apartment, and like that I was alone again.

I went to my computer to start working again, a little information on our adventure today, never too safe, when I was finally comfortable that there was no way for anyone to appear again I went back to the couch and stared at the ceiling, I felt well about how tonight had gone, I closed my eyes to let them rest.


	2. As of some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, lets see how far this goes

I can't even remember what I was dreaming of, it felt like a fog of warmth and nostalgia. But when I awoke it was to the sound of knocking, a jolt my entire system, I wondered if I was still dreaming for a few moments, but the knocking continued, could it have been my mind painting me into a picture I really wasn't a part of again? Or could it be the reality of someone outside my apartment at some unknown time? I let them continue knocking as I got up, if it was some hallucination it would soon pass. 

The only thing was, it didn't. Sure there were pauses, sometimes even movement at the handle, this was a persistent hallucination. So, I offered it some satisfaction, I undid some of the locks, keeping one in place, as I opened the door the few inches it would allow I looked, expecting to see the same empty hallway as per usual with any of these times my mind treated me nothing more than a play thing. 

I was taken aback though, when I looked at eye level I saw a familiar collar I looked up just for a confirming glance, The same eyes that always felt as if I had been locked in some cold box, they always made me tighten my grip to my sleeve, they were nowhere near the worst, but the chills they sent.

"Bonsoir, Elliot"

His usual greeting, always the same, was he mocking me? 

"I came by to talk to you, I must say, finding the place was rather complicated, but not impossible"

He let out a small chuckle, I had herd the same so many times in so many previous encounters, how had he found my address to begin with? Then again it wouldn't be that hard, he did have my employee information, or it wouldn't be too hard to get his hands on them. Still, something to talk about so late? What time was it? How long was I out?

"What is it?"

"Well, I'd rather talk with you, or do you require a password before I'm allowed in?"

"Oh, yeah, one second."  
I didn't want to unbolt the lock, but I knew it was too late, did the knocking maybe wake Shayla? Would she keep an ear out incase anything happened? Why had Flipper not even barked, then again, they were always a quiet dog, a trait that in this moment I wish had not been so.  
My fingers played with the bolt for only a few seconds, but it felt like hours listening to the bearing of my heart. Was I still high? Would he be able to tell?

I finally undid the bolt and opened the door all the way.

"I'm sorry if I woke you, I was reading something and wanted your opinion, I saw your light was on, and well, something in it called me to you"

There he goes again; does he detest me so much that talking in puzzle was so necessary?

" I was actually about to head back, but you opened the door, is this a good time?"

"As good as any, but I do have the next couple of days off, what was it?"

He began to ask me what I thought dreams were, or meant, really? This is why he'd come to my apartment so late? Some bullshit dream analyzing dribble?

As he continued, he began to pace around, almost as if he was in a different place as he went on, and on about his own personal belief of dreams, being that they may be more than our brains creating scenarios out of stress, or emotion, or even just because they can. Bringing up cases of people dreaming of future events, dreaming entire days, living entire lives in a single night. I nodded along giving off the appearance of a good listener, it seemed to work in most cases, waiting for whatever it was that brought me into all of this for him.

".. So, do you think one could possibly dream of some alternative route their life could have taken?"

"I mean, I don't see why not, dreams are usually forgotten soon after waking up, so who's to say?"

"I think we end up remembering our dreams more often than we may think, they may be those strings that seem to pull at only certain moments, entire bonds may be due to dreams one has had of another."

"Maybe, " I began to take a backseat in my mind as he continued. He seemed to enjoy the topic, and having someone to talk about all of this too, but why did it have to be me? Was it more code to hide his real reason for being at my door?

I began to zone out, snapping back when he asked to have a drink, I shrugged pointing to the fridge, cups were on the counter.

That's when it happened, I didn't expect him to go in the freezer, but at that moment I wish I had kept my guard up suddenly remembering what it contained, but maybe he wouldn't see the earlier purchase? 

"What is this, Elliot?"

Like that, I knew exactly why I was never an optimist.

He pulled out a small box from the freezer, looking into my eyes before slowly opening it, 

"Is this what I think it is, Elliot, I wouldn't take you for the type to dabble in such things"

Says the one I wouldn't think even knew what it was, could I say I put bits of paper to freeze for comfort? Would that just dig me deeper?

"It's for a friend"

"Then I suppose that would be a no?"

"No?"

What was he implying, what was he planning? Blackmail? Would he try to use this to make me accept his earlier offer? Did he even still have that on the table?

"To us trying it."

What? No, he was up to something, would Tyrell even try something like that? Or was his motive something else.. 

"I mean, there are quite a few in here, was this truly only for one person to begin with?"

Fuck.

"I don't know what you mean."

"Well, I guess what I'm saying, would your friend mind two missing? I can leave more than enough to cover for them if it'd be an issue, if they would even notice."

What is going on, are you hearing this? Am I even sure I'm hearing this?

"I can be nice, Elliot, believe it or not" He was laughing at a joke that would not process in my mind.

"So, would you think that's acceptable?"

Please, if this was a dream, could I wake up now?


	3. I'm stuck here in my skin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A bit small I know, but give it time

While we placed the tablets on our own tongue, I noticed Tyrell watching me, was he about to do this? Or was this some corner I was volunteering myself to, he hides it away and stay sober this entire time? If I had a bad reaction use it to get information? It was all possible, but sadly I would have to stop thinking about this soon, the last thing I would need is a bad reaction, Shayla explained what to expect for the most part, I should be fine, right?

We sat in silence, focusing on the dissolving tablet on our tongues, at least that's all I could find myself doing, who knew what was on Tyrell's mind besides himself?

"Thirty minutes, right?" Tyrell breaking the silence first, did he feel awkward? Uncomfortable?

"Something like that". I said getting up, I was beginning to get restless, and I knew a good way for some calmness to come before thoughts decided to first. 

I excused myself and went into my room, would this work? I wouldn't inhale it right? I shrugged to myself, and walked back into the living room taking my place on the couch, I hesitantly offered what was in my hand to Tyrell after inhaling.

We kept passing it back and forth like this for a while still in silence, as warmness began to engulf me, it was always a feeling I thought many others knew regularly, it was always a nice temporary feel for me, like a good memory.

I quickly smile to myself it must be happening now, how long had it been? This was more than what I was used to, I knew it wasn't just the weed.

Tyrell sat back smiling to himself, yes, this was definitely the time.

"You want to know something, Elliot?"

I really didn't, "Sure."

"It hurt, when you told me you were happy where you were, what does Allsafe have to offer that I couldn't double? Coworkers? Your boss? It surely wasn't your pay, or was it some form of respect that you felt with me wouldn't be doubled if not tripled? Or did you simply prefer working for some hole in the wall?"

It obviously wasn't a hole in the wall if your company trusted us so well, I never really answered, I simply shrugged leaning back watching my ceiling fan. 

It stayed silent like this for a while, I suppose he wanted an answer, but just like that day it was complicated, why should I believe that he even wanted some unknown worker to work for him in the first place? A place he even calls a hole in the wall, so what exactly did that make me? Sure, the constant topic of interest, but for what? Of what?

"Can we not talk about work?" was what ended up escaping me, he seemed a bit struck by this answer, but the topic did end up dropped.

I'd glance over from time to time wondering just what exactly was going on, still filled with questions but thankfully too high to really care. I mean, sure I did care about what outcome was to come, but all in all, I wouldn't verbalize the possibilities, not even in the safety of my mind, or even to you. 

This was very interesting from a feeling stance alone, sure it would have been better with Shayla I'm sure, someone who has done this before,

It stayed silent for so long, I suppose it would have been a bit of awkward silence, if either of us could wrap our minds around the passage of time, wait? Did I just say that? I’m sorry, I’m starting to sound like Tyrell when he first came here, maybe not on dreams, but some more deep meaning bullshit. 

This is getting awkward now that I’m putting thought into it, I’m just staring and watching my fan, Tyrell is watching me, why does he look at me with that look in his eyes?   
Almost like an animal watching their prey, was that still what I was? Could it be what I’ve been this whole time? Shit, I need to do something, stop thinking on this.

I started to get up, quickly freezing as I felt fingers wrap around my wrist, what was he doing?

“What are you doing, Elliot?”

When I turned to face him, I was not expecting what I received. He looked so genuinely interested, was this a trick?

“I’m, um, going to go fix something, like what we shared before” maybe this would be the correct answer, if he was going to take me down now, I at least would have an even fight after tonight, but still, his hand remained.

“I’ll come with” was what left his mouth, What? Why would he, I softly sighed, and nodded. He let go of my wrist as he got up.

Just what is happening?


	4. I'm stuck with you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, here we are at the end of this work. Maybe we'll get more to it someday, maybe not,  
> probably a future of Elliot being the butt of jokes by Shayla.  
> enjoy, let me know if you liked it.

There we were, for a moment, while my fingers twisted and twirled, I thought on the actions that lead up to this. Not with what I would have if I had at anytime before this moment, thankfully. I was finally in a calm haze, still questioning a lot, specifically on how it all could have gone differently.

What if I had not answered the door? Pretended to sleep? Looked through the peephole instead of believing the sound to be just a hallucination, but really would seeing Tyrell there have furthered the suspicion? Or maybe all this was still just that, had I just gotten high with a hallucination? Could you provide the answers to any of this, friend?

I must have chuckled out loud because Tyrell put his hand on my shoulder, focusing on my eyes asking if everything was alright. I suppose my shrug and placing the joint between his lips was enough of an answer, as I held the lighter to the tip I looked into his eyes, the flame dancing and making them look – What am I about to say, ha. I must really be high. But they looked wonderful.

Tyrell moved his eyes quickly and we both stared into each other’s as he placed the joint between my lips, exhaling. This was nowhere near as awkward as it was at first.  
Like that, my body went into auto pilot, on my second inhaul I was more watching what I did next, I put the joint in the ashtray and placed my hands on his jaw line, he seemed to understand what was happening and that’s when I began giving Tyrell the smoke from my mouth, I was staring at his lips, but I could feel his eyes on me. Time seemed to slow down in those few seconds. What had I done?

Tyrell exhaled again, was that a smile? I saw his hand move to the ashtray, then he attempted to return the favor. His hands felt nice and chill against my warm face, why was it so warm? I looked up again I could feel my eye lids had become heavy after this long night.  
I don’t know when but we ended up laying on my head as we continued smoking, was it just the come down that made us want to smoke so much? Or not wanting this to end? Ha, guess I’m not coming down as much as I thought.  
As we finished, I felt his hand wrap around mine, we laid like that for who knows how long, I could hear a clock ticking by but I didn’t care, I felt warmer than I have ever felt without feeling ill. Is this how it’s supposed to feel? This comfortable?

I must have fallen asleep, I remember smelling him and feeling his hand tighten. That was the best I had ever slept before without help.  
When I woke up, I had a jacket over my hoodie, I got up to grab something to drink, had he left?  
All confirmed when I got to the counter, there neatly folded was a note with my name, I almost felt happy to see it,

" Didn’t want to wake you,  
Thank you, maybe we can do this again sometime?  
-Tyrell  
P.s. : Keep it. “  
I put the note away in a drawer, feeling a smile beginning to form. was I still high?

Did I really care?


End file.
